Sachsenhausen

I have never been to a concentration camp. I have a pretty good imagination but can't begin to put myself in the shoes of anyone who has experienced war in any form. I feel like it's important to visit these places to fully understand the dangers that can happen when power reaches the wrong hands. I woke up on Saturday with plans to head out to Oranienberg and the concentration camp that they had there before, during and after the war. Little did I know it was the first day of Hannukah, but I find it fitting that I spent that day paying my respects and putting myself in the shoes of those who suffered. I took the s-bahn 1 there and though it was chilly it wasn't too bad so I walked instead of taking the bus from the train station. It took about 15 minutes and all the way there I kept thinking that I was seeing things that were, for some people, the last things they saw of the "outside".

I arrived and got my audio guide and followed the long road to the entrance. As I got closer to the gate it seemed to get colder. Inside the museum at the entrance it was heated and I considered getting a hot drink but decided to wait until the way out. The entrance area was also the yard of the home to the commander of the camp and now has memorials set up by individuals and groups. It's hard to describe the many stones and statues that dot the area. I walked through the gates and read the infamous words "ARBEIT MACHT FREI" which translate loosely to "work for your freedom". The first thing I noticed when I took my first step into the fenced area was the sheer size. I knew it would be big but it was the size of 6 or maybe 8 football fields, maybe even more as there were other areas beyond the fences. It was empty and quiet. Only a few buildings remained standing and where others had once stood there were metal frames on the ground showing their place. I stood in the roll call area where the prisoners had to be twice a day. If anyone was missing they would stand there until the problem was fixed or the person found. At 4:30 am they got their wake up call and had to clean, eat breakfast and make their beds before 5 am when roll call began. It was common for new prisoners to have to stand in this area no matter the time they arrived until the next roll call. So 5 am or 8 pm, whichever came first. By the time I had passed though this area to the first building I was frozen through. Inside was not heated, similar to how it would have been back then. The huge buildings had two rooms on either side of the doors and bathrooms, one common area for eating and one for sleeping, and one woodstove that they were sometimes allowed to use. I can't believe anyone survived. It was a solemn day as I walked through the field, visiting the buildings and museums they now house. It was so chillingly cold that I wasn't sure I could continue. I spent about 5 hours at Sachsenhausen. Mostly in the cold with only 2 buildings that had heat to walk through. I read the accounts of survivors and I heard their voices as they described the horrors. I still can't imagine being in their shoes but I have the utmost respect for them, all they survived and all they managed to accomplish.

As I left the camp and walked back down the long drive I thought of the peoole I know and tried to imagine how it would feel to be with your loved ones in a place like this. To see their hopes fade, to see them suffer, and even die. I couldn't. I have compassion for them and the horror I felt that day hurt my heart but how can you begin to imagine such devastation. I dropped off my audio guide and inquired about the bus because I was so cold there was no way I could be outside any longer. The bus service is only every 2 hours on weekends and it had been by an hour ago. Not wanting to wait that long, I set out. And as I walked I realized that it wasn't as cold as it had been. How strange that the bone chilling cold I had been feeling for the past 5 hours was gone even though it was now dark.

I pondered on the way home about what our world might be like if WWII hadn't happened. What new things may have been invented, new words written, new songs sung or horrors never seen.

I feel such appreciation for the freedom I have, my family and friends and for the life I lead.